We all come from Family. Our lineage runs generations, but because of interpersonal relationships or the lack thereof, we might not know who our Ancestors are. Divorce, Death, and moving from one location to another to live are the most common reasons that the younger family members do not know where and from whom they came from – their roots and beginnings. Certain websites such as Ancestry.com have been most helpful in recreating family trees and reconnecting families who have strayed. It is rare for younger generations to search for their roots, more prevalent in those who are at ‘the front of the line’ in age for passing over, but altogether necessary in the event of medical history.
But what if you have a family whose past is steeped in mystery or something that happened to cause connections to be severed or lost? Many will feel like they have been cast adrift, either becoming their own solitary island of DNA or fervently creating their own history to anchor the generations to come. In this case, how does one pay homage to Ancestors they may not know that they have? Here are some suggestions and few ways to create a sacred space or altar to Honor your Ancestors.
Building the Altar or Sacred Space
The most rudimentary form of an Altar is a small table-like structure and a white cloth covering. The base can be a end table, nightstand, or even an empty cardboard box with a tablecloth. Outdoor altars might be a piece of wood or a plank balanced on two stones, a small patio table or wooden crate with fabric covering it.
Adding the element of light (Fire), you can then place two candles on each corner of the back area of the surface. Light in the form of candles, hearkens back to the Temple, where the sacred space was illuminated with Sacred Oils meant for burning in thanksgiving to the Spirits and Higher Powers.
After placing the candles in each back corner, consider using an object you consider sacred and powerfully representing Spirit. This could be a Crucifix, Statue, Sculpture, Plant, Mirror, Seashell, Stone – any object that connects with YOU. Now as a thought, since this Altar is created for honoring your Ancestor, you might consider Grandma’s soup tureen, Uncle Jerry’s pipe, Mom’s Native American statue she kept on the end table in the living room, or any other heirloom you have receiving from and Elder in your family. This gives a more personal feeling to the ritual.
Add a glass of water to the Altar in front of the object you chose to represent Spirit, Water refreshes and cleanses, and is a staple for all Altars for the Spirits, Saints, and Ancestors.
Now is the time to also place photos of the dead on your family, making sure there are no living relatives in the photos with the ones that have passed. If you have photos that only show you AND Grandpa, take the photo to Kinko’s or any other place that scans documents and crop out your image. Then recreate a new photo of Grandpa alone. This will be the photo placed on the Altar.
Placing foodstuffs, beverages, and other items of pleasure and sustenance on the Altar for your Ancestors is crucial to the offering. If you know that your father smoked Lucky Strikes or some other cigarettes or cigars, Mom loved Juicy Fruit gum, Grandma had a thing for gingersnaps, then consider placing these on the Altar to connect with your loved ones so that you can let them know your gratitude and love. Other items to consider are ears of corn, apples, nuts and grains, pastries, tamales, whiskey or other alcoholic beverages, a can of soda, tea and coffee, etc. Make the Altar as full as you can with comforting food and beverages that you remember were in the home.
Other items to use on the Altar are incense, perfume or aftershave (Mom or Dad’s favorite), flowers, trinkets or other tchotchkes that may remind you of Family.
Now, since you may have little to no recollection of specific Ancestors and their roles in your family, here are some considerations for devotional candles to be lit for your Ancestors:
Light a white candle for everyone in your family lineage – whether you know of them or not, honoring anyone remotely related to you is a good baseline for covering the unknown members.
Light a white candle for the Warriors and Military persons that are possibly in your Family – many of us have one service member or trailblazer in the family.
Light a white candle for all the Women who are your Ancestors – you have strong DNA running through you from women who kept the family progressing by giving birth to family members for the next generation to descend from. Honoring the women in the family who gave birth to the future generations is a great way to thank them for keeping the family moving forward.
Light a white candle for all the Men who are your Ancestors – these individuals provided one-half of who you are. Giving them their moment of respect as the other side of the family is just as important as the women in the family. Each gave a part of them that became a part of you.
Light a white candle for all that died tragically – These Ancestors did not have the capacity to fulfill all the the Universe wanted them to achieve, and the honoring of them gives respect for their brief contribution to the Family.
Light a white candle for each of the Nations that came together to create you – Modern day companies such as 23 and Me, have allowed use to investigate our origins like never before. With these new techniques, we have found out that we are not of one Tribe of the Earth, but most of us are a blend of the Peoples of the North, the South, the East, and/or the West. There are for colors and 4 points on the Native American Medicine Wheel, black, white, red, and yellow. Each represent the “tribes” of the Earth. The four colors also represent the four points on the Earth – North, South, East and West. Printing off a Medicine Wheel and using it under your white candle will give respect for those that donated any and all tribal blood that runs through your veins.
This is a basic foundation for your Ancestor altar and you can customize it to fit your particular walk in life or familiar situation that uniquely becomes you. Other considerations for candle devotions that you can consider placing on your Altar are:
* A candle for family members lost because of miscarriages and abortions.
* A candle for any LGBT family members who may have been ostracized from the family because of their life choice.
* A candles for the homeless family members, and the ones who suffer from alcoholism and drug abuse.
* A candle for the shunned family members who lived their life and was judged unfairly by society, culture, or heritage.
Whatever the situation in your family that caused a disruption in the connections between family members, creating a simple and effective Ancestor Altar will give you peace, grounding, and connection to your life and will serve as a baseline or ‘jump off’ space for future ancestral altars to come.
