Dictionary.com defines a Martyr as a person who chooses to suffer death rather than renounce religious principles, or someone who makes great sacrifices or suffers much in order to further a belief, cause, or principle. Becoming a martyr is about sacrificing for a principle, and many of us today can take notes from Joan of Arc since living for God was her main focus. Let me say that again. Living for GOD was her main focus.

Not a man, or a woman, or a partner that left you.

The aforementioned are not God and they are fallible, meaning they make mistakes and can be erroneous in their actions.

So my question to you is this – why are you trying for Sainthood? Who is going to print off prayer cards with your image on the front and your good works on the back?

Let me say now, I am not being snarky or trying to make fun of your suffering because of love that is now lost. I have loved and lost before. I have also been the person that perpetrated that feeling of loss in another. Either way, it is not pretty and it leaves an ugly feeling inside. I am older than most of you readers, and have been through more than one marriage and a couple of long-term relationships, so I can empathize with the feelings of emptiness and loss of a relatiosnhip, as the grief can be as deep as one can imagine.

I read daily in the news that people of both genders attempt to stay in relationships that are far too gone to fix – the damage and the PTSD runs so deep that there is no therapy to fix it. These individuals are chained – even are enslaved themselves – to a notion that the other person is their “soul mate” and have a belief that their love is strong enough to overcome anything. There is a recent national news relationship that is making headlines because the toxicity of the two of these people being together caused a death of the female in this relationship. Clearly there were demonstrations of problems in the recent weeks leading up to the death of one of them – and now the national manhunt of the other one – yet because society is not emboldened enough to separate the two of them, and in many cases the victim often is embarrassed to say anything or press charges, it will very likely cause harm to one or the other.



There are certain cards in your tarot reading that indicate problems in relationships, and many times they detail the success or fail rate of the couple going forward.  Because there are many styles of readings and many types of readers, when a prognosticator (another name for diviner) tells you the future does not look good, it is in your best interest to listen to them.

Imaging this, let’s say a young mother with a couple of children from the boyfriend chooses to leave him and goes through the motions to obtain her own residence, only to allow the boyfriend to move in after a couple of months. She now realizes that his behavior that caused superhero efforts from her to move is STILL being demonstrated but now in her home, which she will now need legal enforcement to get him out. The Bible says that Evil cannot come in unless you INVITE it in, and now the new residence is soiled with that negativity, where it once was clean and had positive vibes. She did not allow enough time to cleanse herself of the toxicity that she and her children were living in, and either the fear of sleeping single in a double bed or the reality of the failure of that relationship drove her back into it. This behavior is called Stockholm syndrome, a personality function that causes victims to remain with their tormentors.

When getting a spiritual consultation or tarot reading, please be open and receptive to the reading indicating trouble ahead – this is not only for you to consider doing candle work or other stronger measures of spiritual work to thwart the negativity, but to also understand that there is a real issue that needs deeper work of the therapeutic kind for the couple to possibly stay together. Again, I emphasize that if you are in a relationship  that is ABUSIVE IN ANY WAY; whether mentally, sexually, emotionally, verbally or physically, you owe it to yourself and your family to RUN to the nearest source of assistance to break this chain of mistratnet before it becomes a GENERATIONAL link of abuse for your offspring and grandchildren.

Do NOT be a Martyr.

The National Domestic Violence Hotline is 800 – 799 – SAFE (7233) 



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