“And the seasons they go round and round
And the painted ponies go up and down
We’re captive on the carousel of time
We can’t return, we can only look behind
From where we came
And go round and round and round
In the circle game” – “Circle Game” – Joni Mitchell


Into a spiritual worker’s life come people that ask for help with an ongoing relationship issues that repeats itself over and over again. It might be a woman, a young mother, seeking wisdom and hope from a reading every couple of months, asking the same questions,

“‘When will _______ move in with me?'”,

“‘Is _____’s family/mother/ex/baby’s mama going to leave them alone?'”

“‘Will we ever get married?'”

The shells are tossed and cards pulled at each question, and frequently more than not, the same answer comes up for them. There is advice given, but much is not considered. It is a merry-go-round that the Querent (the one who asks) and the Diviner ride during that session.

Recently, Leslie Jones make a comment alluding to that not all women are crazy, and that some men are just broken. How true this statement can be for many, both men and women. Sometimes women are considered ‘crazy’ to expect others in their life to get their priorities in order and make positive moves to a more fulfilling life.  To be fair, some men are ‘just broken’ – not only by their hands, but by the “systemic” use of certain societal and cultural ‘norms’ that are accepted use in the past three generations.  It was and it is today still an expectation that a family stays together. At one time, before jobs were readily available for women, social services was not available to women with children who stored men’s clothing in their closets, as the social worker may visit the home to account for the proper total of occupants at that address who filed for services. The quest for equality made changes that all residents of the occupants of that address are eligible as they each in themselves can count themselves as a “household”, and thus allowing the ability for a person to seek employment to maintain the livelihood of the children. This was considered Equality.



The expectations of mothers have not changed much since the dawn of time; they do expect the fathers to contribute to the care of the children, even when those women also enter the workforce to make life better for the family as a whole. The concept of women working was liberating in the fact that it empowered a whole species of humans into achieving their self-worth in other areas than just cleaning and baking. The additional income allowed people to be consumers – of houses, cars, travel, and other items now deemed necessary for living. The whole concept of Living changed for the better in most areas. Unfortunately, an effect of that is a percentage of society expects that to be a constant, which it cannot, as women are the ones who birth the offspring, and will need breaks in their occupations to do so. It is so evident today that it takes two paychecks to achieve any sort of normalcy in a household.

In a certain percentage of the male population, the expectations have been eased and there are many women raising children alone without a constant male figure in the home, as he is living back with his mother or couch surfing, It is quieter at his place of residence, and the expectations of coming in at a decent hour and the inquisition he gets elsewhere is not there. His life is easier there, as there are no Legos to cut your feet when standing up, and Mom almost always has something good cooking in the kitchen. Mom enjoys her son’s company, as many times she is living alone, another ‘casualty’ of a man leaving the residence, which might have been exemplified by her father leaving her mother. This cycle is vicious and no male in the house means the young soldier learns to live by the examples of another teacher.

“Round and around and around and around we go
Oh, now tell me now, tell me now, tell me now you know” – “Stay” – Rihanna

As for the Querent who calls for the reading, they are faced with either issuing a new edict on timelines and expectations that will affect her family’s future – or they will have to accept what is offered to them. Not easy, this crown that is on their brow, but necessary in order for these parents to move forward to instill values necessary for existence to the future adults that are here now. Candles are “prayerful petitions in Light” and are a constant source of petitioning the Heavens for change, but to be truly efficient on your candle offerings, consider using a bit of prayer power to ignite a fire under yourself to change your acceptance of the ‘norms’ that are being exhibited and expect more than what is offered. If not, burn a Reversible or a black candle on their a**. That – and a little less lovin’, might make a change.


Comments are closed.